Cream Scene Carnival

Cog Diss

It has been awhile since I shook the sulpher dust off my shoulders. Cleaned the baby flesh from my thick black nails (dark as a crows wing they be…..nevermore) and joted down some blasphemy. 

Despite what they say about idle hands being the Devils plaything…I’ve been anything but idle. Cerberus developed a serious case of mange on its hind quarters that is all healed up now. But while under treatment I had to fit each head with one of those doggy neck cones so it wouldn’t bite and snap at the area. You can’t even imagine how cacaphonius that can be….yes, cacaphonius. The three cones crashing and scraping all hours of the night. Along with the moans of the damned I barely could think straight. Well you know what they say about the wicked when it comes to rest.

“Coming out” as a Satanist is plagued by a shit ton of societal bugaboo. I don’t advertise my Satanic belief system….though I might hint at it . But if someone asks me I will be honest and say yes…..which is generally followed quickly by…..”it isn’t really what you think. The Satanic Temple is non-theistic and we don’t believe in a god nor Satan. Or anything supernatural.” I could also be called a Fancy Atheist, but I dig the Aesthetic Qualities Satanism is imbued with.  Some ask about the trappings.  Black clothes. Pentagram. Images of Satan and/or Demons.

“Coming out” as a Satanist often creates cognitive dissonance – a term that is used to describe “the feeling of discomfort that results from holding two conflicting beliefs. When there is a discrepancy between beliefs and behaviors, something must change in order to eliminate or reduce the dissonance. Faced by two opposing beliefs – what they believe about me as a person and what they have been taught about Satanists – they struggle to make sense of these contradictions.

Like everything. The mind seeks equilibrium.

How can both things be true? The individual faced with this has to make a choice. If this cognitive dissonance lands on an open mind, I usually get asked questions and I attempt to answer these questions logically. Intelligently. And honestly to the best of my knowledge. 

This power allows us to open minds….as these people then may very well question all of the bullshit paradigms this world has handed them as well…but cognitive dissonance has a negative aspect. While living in Austin, Texas I became friends with a guy named Ricardo. I nicknamed him Oso – Bear in Spanish – due to his size. We quickly found commonalities in Metal music and horror movies, becoming good friends. I attended both his daughters baptisms and I had holiday dinners with his family. He helped me move when I got divorced in the middle of a BRUTAL Central Texas August (the test of any true friendship). He was my brother….my brohiem. 

When Cream Scene Carnival Magazine published my first Dear Satan, I sent the link to Oso.

The next day there was a text from him “Is this you?”

I texted back “Yup.”

I never heard from Rick again. 

Faced with the conflicting beliefs he threw away all of the good things he knew about me as a person and replaced them with a lie. Since Satan is evil, so am I. 

Well, the Hell hound is sticking each of its heads under my elbow as I try to type this. It’s time for its Sunday morning walk. I urge you readers to be blasphemous and do something Satanic….like pick up a book on a subject you know nothing about. The bible clearly states that a path to Satan is knowledge. I suggest “The Happy Satanist – Finding Self Empowerment – by Lillith Star.”