Cannabis for Festivus

Written by Chef Sutton

Art by Gina Falange

Making the Butter (A Poem for the Stoned)

Two pounds of butter and an ounce of weed
Gonna make the edibles that we need

Could go fancy and use a magic butter machine
(Or just a crockpot, but pre-grind that weed)

Cook it low and slow for an hour or two
Crockpot lowest setting and a quart of water will do

Now you need to separate the plant mass from the grease
Fine-mesh sieve or coffee filter should move us along with ease.

Overnight in the fridge will separate the water
Unless you used magic butter, then you won’t have to bother

Now you have your butter and can use it however you like to
Just don’t eat too much or you’ll be yelling, “What did you do, fool?”



Two pounds of butter; one ounce of weed; a round or wedge of brie; candied pecans; fresh raspberries or blackberries (or you can use a nice jam or chutney).


A fine sieve or coffee filters; and a crock-pot or magic butter machine like Chef’s.


Important: If using a crock-pot, grind the weed first.

Add butter and ground weed, plus a quart of water, to the crock-pot. Make sure the crock-pot is on the lowest setting. Cook it low and slow for 1-2 hours.

(See slideshow below for settings; all photos by Chef Sutton.)


To separate the plant mass from the grease, use a fine-mesh sieve or coffee filter.

Once strained, refrigerate overnight to separate the water. (If using the magic butter machine, you can skip this step).


You now have weed butter for the holidays that you can use on all kinds of snacks, like cinnamon toast made ASAP.

For now, for the brie, melt just a few tablespoons.

Butter a cookie sheet to toast slices of bread, painted on both sides with herbal-infused butter. Paint the brie pan with weed butter. Unwrap the brie and place it in the pan, then brush it with your herbal butter. Add scoop of jam, chutney, or fresh berries.

Go nuts and add candied pecans or slivers of sugared almonds.

Bake in the oven at 375 degrees until the brie collapses. Serve hot with weed-butter toast.

Cooking With Cannabis will be a regular feature here at the Carnival. In the Valentine’s Issue, our Stoner Chef will share his method for cream infusion and show us how to make a sexy chocolate mousse for two. (Or you.)

Cream Scene has no affiliation with Magic Butter. Chef just likes his kitchen gadgets.

About the Author

Chef Sutton has been in the culinary world for over twenty years and has led his own team for the past decade. It all began in Austin in 2012 with a food truck—Gonzo—that paid homage to both Hunter Thompson and The Muppets. A counter-culture blend that Sutton swears by.

About the Artist

Gina Falange uses art to escape chronic illness and the world we live in. Through AI, she can retreat to the past, to a time before she got sick, when things were different for her. She has a big love for the ’80s and vintage illustration. She loves Garfield and The Golden Girls.

One response to “Cannabis for Festivus”

  1. Frank Anderson Avatar
    Frank Anderson

    Chef. What genotype did you use for the cannabutter? The only experience I had making any sort of edible was taking about an ounce…..(dregs left from other ounces) decarbing in the oven I think for 20 minutes @ 225. The whole apartment smelled like a dispensary. Then dumped it into a 750ml of Ciroc vodka. I left it in a Ball jar for about 10 days. Then filtered out the plant material. Put back in the Ciroc bottle. Cannabis flavored vodka. Prost!

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